Ha Ha Ha Ha

The title is merely me laughing at the fact that I have blogged twice in the past two months.  I find that funny.  This blog is very unimportant to me, yet I feel as if I should be blogging more.  Oh well.  I guess I'll just bulk a bunch of things together like I did in May, which happened to be one of my busiest blogging months.

So, here is more stuff.

School starts up again this month and officially begins my journey into the world of graphic design.  I will be taking four classes: Design Color, Drawing and Media Methods, Fundamentals of Photography, and Typography.  All four of these class will be crammed into a Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday evening schedule, which both is cool and sucks at the same time.  I am very excited to be taking all of these classes, but due to the limited amount of class times that I had to chose from, there will be a lot of difficult planning around both Lisa and Collin's schedules.  These are the heartaches of a "one car" family.  

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Last weekend we were invited down to the lake by Lisa's Uncle Tom and Aunt Judy.  Lisa's cousin Kelly and her daughter Macy were down there too, all the way from San Diego.  Macy is two years older than Collin, so they were keen on hanging around each other.  Also Collin, the big boy that he is, was as comfortable as he has even been jumping and swimming in the lake.  

Coming in from jumping off the boat.

Being wet.  Very wet.

About ready to take a jetski ride.

Enjoying the speed of the boat.

Cousin Macy, Collin and Lisa on a huge tube.

Collin and Macy.

A funny thing about that last photo, Collin lost his second tooth durning that dinner while eating corn on the cob.  He actually swallowed the tooth.  This was a big change compared to how he lost his first tooth.  We still need to right the Tooth Fairy a letter explaining what happened.

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I have an idea for a graphic novel.  After a couple of conversations during frisbee golf, I have put together a small outline.  The outline consists of a brief description of the premise, brief descriptions of all of the main characters and some side characters, and all of the chapters mapped out with brief descriptions  of what should happen in each chapter.  I guess the next step would be to look at each individual chapter and outline those in more detail.  The outline has been shared with a couple of friends.  

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Lots of stuff going on improv-wise:  Two shows at the Westport Coffeehouse (BareTV and Improv Thunderdome), another show at the recordBar, and at the end of the month the Trip Fives are finally heading up to the Roving Imp Theater to do a show.  I'm not sure which one I am more excited about.  

The last two run-throughs of BareTV have been a lot of fun.  The concept is very different from the show we did in 2000.  And the addition of a live band really give it a talk show feel that we didn't have before.  

The first round of Thunderdome with the drafted teams was a hugh success in my opinion, even though it was not a sold out crowd.  The teams were very impressive and put together formats that were very entertaining. My team doesn't perform until September.  I have had one rehearsal with my team, Temporary Sanity, so far and it was a blast.  We spent the first 20 minutes or so talking about formats, and then came up with three we'd like to try.  Then we spent the rest of rehearsal trying each format.  The process was fun and I am excited to perform with those on my team.

On a side note, I am toying with the idea of putting Thunderdome on hiatus until I am done with school, which should be a couple of years.  Thunderdome takes up a lot of time and the whole process wears on me mentally.  However, there is something in the works that might change my idea of shelving it.

The Trip Fives will have their second show at the recordBar this month, sharing the stage with Improv-Abilities.  Our first show with Loaded Dice was big for a Tuesday night.  We had over 85 people in attendance. The bulk of the people ate and drank as well, which is a plus.  I am very curious of how the next show will go. I think it will be better than the first.

The show at the Roving Imp will be a lot of fun.  John Robison and I have talked about me and/or the Fives performing up there for a while now.  The stars have finally aligned.  We will either be performing as the Trip Fives, possibly honing the piece that we would like to present at the upcoming improv festival, or we will join a couple of the other shows that were originally slated to perform.  Either way, it will be an exciting night.

 

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And lastly, my dad bought Lisa and I a new mattress and box springs as an early birthday present for both of us. The old one was so uncomfortable.  It's very nice to experience comfortable sleep again.  Thanks Dad!

Royal Moves

As a fan of the Kansas City Royals, this year has been the worst I have ever seen.  There is no way possible that this franchise will be significant in the next few years.  Jim Souhan of the Minneapolis Star Tribune recently said that the Royals were "in the 11th year of their three year rebuilding program."  Sooooooo true. Since this season has been nothing but huge steps backwards, I expect nothing out of next years team. That being said, as the trade deadline approaches, here is a list of Royals' current 40 man roster that i wish would stay and go.

Pitchers that stay:

Brian Bannister

Henry Barrera

Bruce Chen

Roman Colon

Juan Cruz

Kyle Davies

Zach Greinke

Luke Hochevar

Julio Cesar Pimentel

Carlos Rosa

Joakim Soria

Robinson Tejeda

Pitchers that go:

John Bale

Kyle Farnsworth

Devon Lowery

Ron Mahay

Gil Meche

Sidney Ponson

Doug Waechter

Jamey Wright

Batters that stay:

Mike Aviles

Willie Bloomquist

Billy Butler

David DeJesus

Alex Gordon

Tug Hulett

Mike Jacobs

Kila Ka'aihue

Mitch Maier

Brayan Pena

Batters that go:

John Buck

Alberto Callaspo

Coco Crisp

Jose Guillen

Luis Hernandez

Mario Lisson

Travis Metcalf

Miguel Olivo

Tony Peny Jr.

Mark Teahen

Yeah I know, because of stupid contracts and whatnot, all of my roster dreams will not come true.  However, whoever they move this year, I hope it is not for the unrealistic hopes of winning next year.

Side note - I'd like to see either Cory Aldridge or Scott Thorman in the outfield soon.

A Letter to the Kansas City Royals

Warning:  This post contains lots and lots of expletives

Dear Royals,

What the fuck is wrong with you?  I mean seriously, you all fucking suck. What the fuck?  Why do you continue to be so fucking awful? Yeah, whatever, you had a winning April for the first time since 2003, big fucking deal.  That shouldn't be an accomplishment to be proud of.  The only reason you looked so good in the first 30 games this year was because no teams had taken you seriously.  Now we all have seen what happens when teams start paying you a little attention.  

Seriously, you've fucking managed to play worse this past month than the past 5 years combined.  What the fuck happened? Every pitcher you face becomes a Cy Young candidate, and every offense you face becomes the Yankees.  What are you planning on doing to change this?  How about this:

• Quit giving up first inning runs, you pieces of shit!!  Even you Greinke.  I don't care what your record is or how many complete games you have. You all are getting paid well enough to get 3 outs without allowing a run in the first.  This is fucking ridiculous.  If I were Hillman, I'd have someone warming up in the bullpen the moment the game started.  Once the first run crosses the plate, yank whoever is out there.  Fuck them!  Don't give up a run in the first next time.

• Get rid of Jose Guillen.  Fuck him and his legs. The offensive is so awful right now that who cares if he is gone, it wouldn't change anything.  I don't know how many fly balls have dropped in front of him this year, but I do know that nearly all of them have led to opposing runs.  Screw him.  Get him out of here and put someone, anyone with fresh legs in right field.

• When it comes to second base and shortstop, I am clueless.  Everybody in the organization sucks at those two positions.  Like the balls dropping in front of Guillen, I don't know how many slow rollers up the middle I have seen this year.  If people are in the lineup because if their bat, good luck with all that. 

• Have a catcher fire sale.  Get rid of both of them. They fucking suck in all categories.  Neither of them can call a game worth of shit.  Bring up the switching hitting Pena.  If he sucks, well, he's a rookie and it's what is expected.  Olivo and Buck have no more excuses for sucking so bad.
  

Make those changes (as well as trading Teahan to the Cardinals for Khalil Greene as soon as Alex Gordon is healthy) and I will be a happy fan.  Or as happy as a Royals fan could be. 

Until then, fuck you all for sucking so bad.  The stadium looks great.

Stuff

Has it been five weeks?  Five weeks since I stopped drinking soda pop?  It has!  How do I feel?  Normal I guess.  I haven't noticed any big change yet, and I don't really expect to for quite a while.  In this five weeks I have been substituting iced tea for soda.  It's been okay.  Recently, however, I have learned about a drink called the Arnold Palmer.  It's iced tea mixed with lemonade.  I like it a lot.  

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I received my grades from school.  All A's.  I think this is the first time that has ever happened.  Unless you were to go all the way back to elementary school, in which one year I got all S's.  I may have even gotten a new toy out of it. 

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Collin has been having an interesting last couple of weeks of Kindergarten.  The usually angel-like school boy had done something so out of character that they school actually had to call me and ask me to come get him, 45 minutes before school was going to be let out anyway.  I would say they overacted a tad, especially since we're talking about a 6 year old here.  I won't go into detail about what happened.  Instead, I will direct you to the blog of my lovely and talented wife, Lisa. She has described this event better than I ever could.

Lawnmower Man

I should have mowed the lawn last night, but I put it off until this morning while the rest of the neighborhood was at work.  It's because our lawnmower is dying.  Or at least it sounds like it is.  It's awful.  It felt like I'd be doing everyone's ears a favor by mowing it early.

I caught a break this morning when a CAT showed up across the street and started destroying the driveway across the street.  So I got out there and started in on the law.  I think the noise of the CAT drowned out the mower, but it was hard to tell, over the GOD-AWFUL coughs and belches of our mechanical death cutter.  I swear I saw the driver of the CAT give me a few "Dude. WTF?" looks.

I think its time to get a new mower.

I Know The Economy Is Bad, But Sheesh!

Last night the family went out to eat at a local Chinese buffet in Waldo.  We visit this place every now and then 1.) because it's close, 2.) because we love Chinese buffets, and 3.) because there is a claw game there that Collin likes to play.

This place is not one of the friendliest of places in town. However, this does not keep us from enjoying the food.  

At one point last night, Collin accidentally spilled his drink on the table.  Being the natural reflexing parents that we are, Lisa and I grabbed the closest absorbent objects we could find (which happened to be a basket of napkins on the table) and proceeded to mop up the table and floor with them.

When the lady at the front register caught wind of the situation, she rushed over and gasped at the sight of all the wet napkins.  

"All those napkins" she muttered with a look of disbelief.

She snatched napkins from our hands and then started sifting through them, as if to be looking for ones that weren't that wet, right there at our table.  Once she felt that it was a lost cause, she walked away shaking her head.

A few moments later, Lisa and Collin walked up to the register, with Collin holding the last of the wet napkins, to ask if we did anything wrong.  The woman grabbed the napkins out of Collin's hands and threw then in the trash, shook her head some more and said that her english wasn't so good.  

Whatever.  She can be upset  But it made me want to walk around to ALL the tables and pour soy sauce into every basket of napkins.

It's too bad the food is so good, otherwise we'd probably stop going.  It might take them getting rid of the claw game to do so. 

So THAT'S What Big Brothers Are For.

I'm old enough to admit it now, I wanna be just like my brother, Derek.  Although I am smarter, funnier and better looking, he leads in age, height and weight. We're about even on facial hair.

All kidding aside, he has done something recently that I am extremely impressed with and am going to attempt to copy - giving up soda pop for good.  Derek is going on 14 months now and talks about the effects it has had on him at his blog These Pretzels Are Making Me Thirsty. 

I've talked about my teeth before.  I get worried about them from time to time.  The best thing I can do is (Yes, Yes, go to the dentist.  I know!) quit with the soda, which I drink a ton of.  A ton is kind of an exaggeration.  I don't even drink much at home. It's those restaurants!!!  They get me with those "free refills" every time.  I suck'em down one after another like its a natural reflex or something.  Gotta stop.

Anyway, I haven't had a soda since Thursday.  Not quite a week.  Not quite 14 months. Baby steps.