Ford Expletive

I hate cars. Me and cars do not really go good together. I had two cars in high school. My first one, a blue Toyota Corolla, lasted 2 weeks and was destroyed in a rain induced accident. Not my fault and I was fine. My second car, a red Toyota Tercel named Shogun, somehow lasted through my senior year. Jump-starts were an every other day occurrence. Another car accident later, again not my fault, and it was put to rest. My third car was a Chevy Blazer. It was slowly murdered due my lack of care. (It needs an oil change how often?) It's engine exploded on the highway. Next came my Aunt's Ford Taurus. It became obsolete when I was just barely able to break as I entered a mechanic. The breaks were so bad that the guy wouldn't let me drive out of there. Throw in the fact that I kept dumping this junk into the radiator because it was suppose to plug a hole in one of the tubes. Ahhhhh cars.

I have gotten better. I take much better care of our car now. Regular oil changes every 3000 miles and tune ups whenever we've got an out of state drive. Too bad it took a half a dozen cars to get to this level of expertise. But still, I know that me and cars will never have a healthy relationship.

We recently received out federal return and had it no more than a day before we spent 75% of it on our Ford Explorer. Tires, brakes, belts, plugs, aligning, and all that jazz. I knew it was something that needed to be done so I was not that put off by it. The tires and alignment was the reason I went in. While I was there I said, "Give it a full inspection." The grease monkey responded with, "You want a 24 point inspection?" I asked if that meant that they would give the car a full once over. The guy said sure so I said okay.

An hour later I get a call telling me that new brakes were necessary. Knowing that our bank account was thriving due to the return, I didn't even let the guy finish. "Do it and call me when you're done." Two hours later I drove away with a fresh feeling car.

This was last week. Today my car won't start. It's in the driveway just sitting there. I called Sears and asked what all the 24 point inspection entails. They said everything but the battery, ignition and starter.

Fucking GREAT!!!!!!!